3 Things I Learned from The Fuck It Diet
A refreshing bowl of nice cream.
I read a lot of self-help books. This is partly because I need a lot of help… BUT I also do it for work. I like to keep abreast of all the new thinking around self-worth, happiness, leadership, etc. so I can guide and coach the participants in my programs with better, properly researched ideas.
The self-help genre has seemingly changed over the last decade. It used to be a whole lot of, “I’M A HERO, AND SO CAN YOU” and it now feels more, “I FUCKED EVERYTHING UP, AND MAYBE YOU HAVE TOO?” It’s a bit more personal, well-researched, and approachable.
I’d like to start sharing the top lessons I learn from these books because KNOWLEDGE IS POWER. (A lesson taught to me by my favorite self-help series of all time, Schoolhouse Rock!)
Recently, after years and years of dieting, I’ve been dipping my toes into… not dieting? Last year, I re-joined Weight Watchers for the 150th time and lost 25-30 pounds. It’s basically the same 25-30 pounds that I’ve been losing and gaining for my entire adult life. However, I’ve kept it off for about a year, and I believe it’s due to a mental shift I’ve been trying to make. I don’t want to diet forever! I don’t want to eat nonfat greek yogurt and pretend it’s cake. I don’t want to eat Lean Cuisines or sugar-free syrup or carefully count out almonds.
I want to eat vegetables because I like them, and not treat them like they’re a punishment. I’ve always repelled veggies because I have this image of boiled, mushy carrots and sides of steamed broccoli and plain, boring salads. It doesn’t have to be that way. I’ve started reimagining ways to eat them and the whole world has opened up to me.
I’m also tired of hating my body or feeling like a second-class citizen because parts of my body jiggle. I’m tired of disordered eating, and depriving myself, and THINKING ABOUT FOOD ALL THE TIME. So, I read this book, The Fuck It Diet, and I’m sharing the most impactful (to me!) lessons.
FAMINE STATE + RESTRICTION. When we diet, our bodies go into fight/flight famine mode. When we start restricting food and losing weight, we plateau because our bodies are like, “OH NO - WE’RE IN A FAMINE. I’LL HELP YOU ADJUST.” Our bodies are constantly trying to FIGHT weight loss, which is why it’s so hard. We were not made to look good (and good is subjective and has changed over time), we were made to be ALIVE. Our response has been to starve and restrict these bodies of ours that are just trying to keep us alive, and they keep fighting for us while we work against them. It’s a losing battle.
Also, when we restrict, our brains are hardwired to want and crave that food more. It also makes us terrible and exhausting for our friends when we cannot stop talking about what we’re tracking and how many points something is! I can’t help it. It’s addicting!
SET WEIGHT THEORY. Healthline explains, “Setpoint theory states that our bodies have a preset weight baseline hardwired into our DNA. According to this theory, our weight and how much it changes from that set point might be limited. The theory says some of us have higher weight set points than others and our bodies fight to stay within these ranges.”
This theory is debated amongst the science world, but the idea suggests that we have a predetermined weight range that we constantly try to lower, but our bodies actively fight against it. This would explain why The Biggest Loser contestants have mostly gained their weight back, and why some people find themselves back in that same 15-pound range every time they stop dieting.
LIMITING BELIEFS. What are the limiting beliefs we have about our own bodies, or larger bodies in general? What type of marketing (geared towards our insecurities) has affected us over time? What have our families/friends told us? WHAT DID THE EARLY 2000s TEACH US ABOUT BEING FATTER?
There are so many beliefs that I have because it’s what people, or society, told me. Fat does not mean unhealthy, I can do things even though I’m bigger (like wear a bathing suit, or attend a yoga class or DATE), and eating a burger every now and then is PERFECTLY FINE.
Ultimately, I really enjoyed the book and the concept of NOT DIETING. There were many times that I wanted to reject her thinking. She would suggest we start eating everything we crave, all the time. And I’d think, “But what about overeaters?” and then she’d address that we overeat more often than not for emotional issues we’re neglecting, not because our bodies are hungry and we’re nourishing them. Then I’d say, “OH YEAH? Well what about alcohol?” and she’d tell me that alcohol is not a NEED, while food is. So, no, we shouldn’t “overeat” alcohol.
I’m still working through some limiting beliefs, yet this book helped me on my journey towards finding a healthier relationship with food. The more I eat normal foods, the more it’ll reduce their stigma. The less I restrict something, the less I’ll crave it. When I can order a pizza any time I feel like pizza, the less I’ll feel like I have to eat that entire pizza in one sitting because tomorrow it goes away again.
I deleted my WW app this week (and can’t believe I was spending $20 a month on that thing for the last few YEARS to lose the same weight over and over, thinking it was VALUABLE). I am so ready to (hopefully) never diet again and (eventually) have a healthy relationship with who I am and what I put into my body.
Well, food-wise. Still need to work on a healthy relationship with the men I let into my life.
Was that gross? Was that a gross way to end this? Oh well, it was funny… because it’s truuuuueeee!