I had two options: I could think that, believe it, and spend the entire day making self-destructive decisions (binge eating, lying on the couch, avoiding work and responsibilities, doom scrolling) and hating myself. Or, I could think it, say NOPE, NOT TODAY, and drink a ton of water and some coffee and go on with my life.

I sometimes wonder if I’m not merely an old soul, but actually the ghost of a young Victorian girl.

Stuck with nothing to do and nowhere to go, I turned to God. Just kidding. I decided to meditate.

Other than trapping a man with a baby out of spite, I haven’t felt a calling to become a mom.

Every now and then, I think about the lives I could have lived if I had made slightly different choices. Not major life changes, but VERY small things that would have barely impacted my life.

What if I went with the Melrose apartment over the Malden one?

What if I ordered the amatriciana pasta during Easter dinner instead of the butternut squash ravioli??

What if I chose the Peanuts checks rather than Scenes from Small Town America??!?!

The key to being rich is NOT through marrying an old man for his wealth, it is through PRIORITIZING your spending on what matters to you the most. I like pink champagne… but I won’t pay over $10 for a bottle! #RICH

WHAT HAPPENS AFTER DINNER? What do you do for fun?

My ego is like the rose in the glass votive from Beauty and the Beast. I agonize over every single petal that falls off because once it dies, I stay a beast! AND WHO COULD EVER LEARN TO LOVE… A BEAST? 

I once actively believed that I connected easier with men and was destined to always be one of the guys. I didn’t have a ton of confidence then, I wonder why.

A photo diary of a WEIRD YEAR spent sheltering-in-place during a pandemic. I learned a lot, I grew a lot, but mostly I drank a lot.

One woman’s journey to let things go… even though IT ALL SPARKS JOY.

Life doesn’t make sense and it’s not fair. How do we keep moving forward when it feels pointless?

What does a comedian look like beyond performing live? Can you even be considered a comedian if you’re not on stage multiple nights a week in front of a live audience? Are podcast hosts comedians, or just podcast hosts? Can you even have a podcast without being a comedian with credits or stage time to your name? CAN YOU EVEN GET STAGE TIME ANYMORE WITHOUT HAVING A PODCAST? 

Who needs marriage when you can be your own DINK? (Double income, no kids.)

At this moment, I can say with sincerity that I am the happiest I have ever been. Not because I found my dream job, but because I shifted my focus to building my dream life by learning what I wanted and prioritizing what mattered.

From maple syrup and coffee to sweatbands and expensive, glowy SPF… these are the things we have influenced each other to buy during the pandemic.

The one where I realize I have an eating disorder and decide to work through my nearly life-long body dysmorphia.

It’s Dry January! Or Whole 30 Month! Or “I Drank So Much That I Scared Myself so I’m Taking a Break” Time!